Bearly Deniable Read online

  With my face buried in this video, I couldn’t even react to what my mother had so cheerfully suggested during our call. Having sex with Ryan haunted my dreams, but I couldn’t act on it. I was leaving in a month, and it wouldn’t be fair to either of us if we took whatever was between us any further.

  But she does have a point. I can always work online if I wanted to stay here. The thought came unbidden, and I groaned before setting my phone on the floor. Being an accountant was a job that I didn’t need to be in the office to do, but I enjoyed going to work. I liked my daily chats and interactions with other people. True, I might not have had a passion for it, but I was far from unhappy.

  “Ugh! Mom! Why do you do this to me?” Pulling up my legs to rest my forehead on my knees, my complaining surged through the r empty, quiet house. My thoughts didn’t stop, though. No, they continued to torture me with logic. Plus, now I have this big house, no payments, no bills, and money coming out of my ears if I were to sell some of the stuff in the attic…

  Clapping my palms over my ears, I took a deep, hard breath and shook my head. No, no- Sylvia, you can’t think about this stuff. Ryan is sexy and nice and sweet, but you met him a week and a half ago.

  … But I don’t need to be in love to have sex - very gratifying, prolonged sex.

  “God… why me?”

  Carefully pulling my homemade pizza out of the oven, a smile lifted my cheeks at how perfect it looked. Thick, chunky pieces of bacon sat on top a bubbling layer of cheese that had browned in some spots, and the crust was a nice, dark golden brown. Setting the tray on the stove, I took a moment to admire my handiwork before taking off my mitt.

  “Sylvia? I’m coming in.” Ryan’s deep, naturally hoarse voice tickled my eardrums, and my heart pounded against my ribs. Whirling around, my eyes widened as they locked on his form. Today he hadn’t even bothered to wear a shirt at all, and a lump formed in my throat. Each defined, bulging muscle that roped around his bones shifted with his gait, and a low burning heat swirled into a ball in my abdomen.

  “Ryan… um- I wasn’t expecting you until 2 p.m.,” Only barely did I manage not to stutter around him, and Ryan arched an eyebrow as he stepped into the kitchen.

  “It is 2 p.m., Sylvia. But if you have something else to do I can leave and come back later.” Pausing a few feet from me, Ryan tilted his head to reveal his ponytail as it fell over his broad, bare shoulder. My fingers twitched at the sight, and a plume of heat billowed up my neck as my mind scrambled for an answer.

  “N- no… that’s okay. I just… lost track of time… I guess. I was doing some research- but this morning I saw a bear-” Relief poured into my chest as I grabbed my phone from the island. “Oh my God, Ryan, it was huge! It came right up to my back porch!”

  I was beyond glad that the topic wasn’t as awkward as before, and I thumbed through my phone with steady fingers. Sidling up to me, Ryan’s closeness made my breath hitch, but I forced the sensation away. It took me only a second to get to the video, and he reached to wrap his large hand around mine.

  “That’s definitely a male…” Amusement colored Ryan’s tone, and he let out a laugh as the creature on the screen leaned back to show off his chest. “It looks like he’s posturing himself. Oh God - that’s funny. I guess I’m not the only one that thinks you’re beautiful.”

  Glancing over, heat overwhelmed my face at the compliment. Ryan’s eyes met mine, and goosebumps washed my chest and arms. His orbs shimmered with merriment, and the corners of his eye crinkled slightly. Brushing the back of my palm with his thumb, he seemed to suck me into a place where nothing else existed but us.

  “You think that?” The sound of my weak, breathless voice made me tense up, and Ryan released my hand to take hold of my chin.

  “I know it.” It was such a cheesy, typical line, but it still made my breath hitch and my abdomen twist. Leaning down, Ryan’s nose brushed against mine and my eyelids automatically shuttered together. “I want to kiss you, Sylvia.”

  Soft, questioning, Ryan’s lips hovered only an inch from mine. I couldn’t breathe, my heart beating too rapidly in my chest. My mind was blank, neither screaming at me that this was a bad idea nor telling me to take that step.

  “B- but… But I-” Callused skin stopped my stuttering protest, and Ryan trailed his thumb over my lips.

  “Don’t tell me ‘no’ because you’re only here for a short while, Sylvia. Tell me ‘no’ because you don’t want me.” There was a hard edge to Ryan’s tone, and I sucked in air through my teeth. Blinking back the colors in my eyes, I licked my lips only to catch the rough skin of his thumb pad. Gasping at the thick, heady taste that attacked my taste buds, my lung shuddered in their cage.

  “Yes…” I didn’t even have a fraction of a second to worry about the repercussions before Ryan descended on my lips. His kiss was electrifying, and the soft peach fuzz hairs on my body stood straight up. Rough, chapped lips dominated mine with a fury that made my head spin. I dropped my phone, forgotten, to wrap my arms around his strong neck. A harsh gasp burst from my throat when his hands cupped my butt, and he slid his soft, wet tongue past my teeth.

  Moaning softly, I touched my tongue to Ryan’s before they tangled together. Our kiss deepened, and I tightened my grip on his neck as his muscles flexed against my chest. Pulling me up onto the island, he wrapped my legs around his waist as my juices threatened to seep through my underwear.

  Rolling my hips, I buried my fingers underneath Ryan’s pony tail as he pulled up my t-shirt. It was the only thing keeping my tight, aching breasts from his gaze, and they quivered in anticipation. The fabric scraped against my skin, but never lifted the shirt up past my underarms. He only splayed his hands against my ribcage. The space between his thumb and pointer finger cradled my breasts, the globes heavy from lack of any support.

  Arching my back, my silent plea didn’t go unnoticed. Ryan tore his mouth from mine, and our harsh, ragged breaths mingled in the tiny space between us. Forcing my eyes open, they rolled slightly as the frantic pumping of my lungs rubbed my nipples raw.

  “You…” Gulping down the dryness in my throat, my tongue tingled from the loss of his as it ran over the roof of my mouth. “You stopped…”

  Ryan’s gaze met mine, and the swirling, dark desire I found there made my skin ripple. Instead of saying anything he just shook his head, and my brows came together. Slowly, heavily, reluctantly, his palms fell from my chest, and I blinked hard as he carefully rearranged my shirt.

  “I’m not going to jump you in your kitchen, Sylvia. When we get there, I’d rather take you somewhere where we’re not restricted to two positions.” My eyes narrowed as annoyance flooded my being, and Ryan reached to take my face between his warm, clammy palms. “Don’t be like that, baby. There are much more comfortable places for lovemaking, and I’ll take you on all of them. But not today. We need to get some work done in your attic, and I have to get back to the bar to open up.”

  My body betrayed my mind. Displeasure coated the lining of my veins, but I could only huff as my rational side told me this was for the best. In fact, it would be best if this kiss was all it was, it whispered.

  But something told me this wouldn’t be the last time our lips touched. Not by a long shot.

  Chapter Nine: Ryan

  Watching Sylvia’s incredible, tight ass as she rummaged through a dusty box, my eyes narrowed into slits, and my palms tingled. The shorts she was wearing did nothing to ease my imagination, and my bear rumbled quietly at the back of my mind in appreciation. My chest tightened with the phantom sensation of her breasts pressed against it, and I pursed my lips together.

  She wasn’t too skinny, with full hips and a generous layer of fat that I wanted to see slowly thin out as she grew rounder.

  “If you keep staring at my butt we’re never going to get this done, Ryan.” My eyes flickered up as Sylvia twisted around to look at me. My blood burned at the tease in her voice and the slight smirk she wore. Behind the safety of my jeans, my co
ck swelled at her confidence. I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying the wrong thing, and instead only shrugged absently as my mind tried to find something better to roll off my tongue.

  “What’s wrong with looking? I can’t appreciate your body?” We’d been up in this baking attic for an hour or so, and sweat was collecting between my shoulder blades. I couldn’t understand why it was so hot up here when it was maybe 50 degrees outside, but I wasn’t complaining. Sylvia’s thin shirt stuck to her form, and her skin glistened in the bright sunlight that trickled through the few, small windows.

  “Ryan, what are we going to do, exactly? Make out and get touchy feeling until I go back home? No - I’m not forcing that on myself or on you.” Abandoning the box in front of me completely, I reached up to scratch my beard. Sylvia was right, of course; she had no plans of staying even after that conversation with her mother this morning. Then again, she doesn’t know I kind of eavesdropped on her.

  “It’s not a terrible thing to have a little fun. You’re going to be here for another month at least, right? And if you are dead set on leaving, I’m not going to stop you, but I bet it’s been a long time since you’ve-”

  “Do not go there, Ryan.” Sylvia’s gaze hardened into a glare, and I bit back a sigh before shuffling over to her. I could see the physical effect I had on her as color bled into her cheeks and her lips thinned out. Now wasn’t the time to smile, though.

  “Listen, if you can look into my eyes and tell me with a straight face that you don’t want me, then I’ll stop trying. We’ll keep a strictly platonic relationship between us.” Watching her think, I knew she couldn’t do what I asked. Hell, she knew she couldn’t if the flash in her eyes was anything to go by.

  Taking her biceps in my hands, I held her firmly as hope began to squeeze the air from my lungs. “I get it. You don’t want to go back home and deal with heartache. I understand that very well. But, Sylvia, why is that the only option? I’m not saying to throw your life; I would never ask that of you. Just consider this, consider us, and see where it goes.”

  “Why are you doing this to me, Ryan?” My skin prickled at the heaviness of Sylvia’s question, and she heaved a sigh before reaching up to push her fists into her eyes. “Can I think about it?”

  Instantly my head ducked in a nod, and triumph filled every cell in my body near to exploding. Dragging my palms up to her cheeks, I couldn’t resist pressing my lips to her forehead. Her gasp rang in my ears beyond the blood that pounded against my ear drums, and finally, a smile cracked my lips.

  Releasing Sylvia, I took a good-sized step back to give her some space. “Do you need help moving that box? What’s in it?”

  The tension in the air dropped fast enough to give me whiplash, and Sylvia twisted back to the box she’d been working on. My eyes ached to fix on her backside, but I wasn’t going to push it. For a long second, she was silent, staring at the open flaps and what lay below them.

  “Uh - just some trains still in their boxes. It can go over there, behind the door.” Over the course of the past few days, I’d realized that what cluttered this attic was Sylvia’s great aunt’s entire life. The old woman had collected so many things, and she had a great eye for the future. A sentimentality like that would’vemade her a wonderful lady, and a deep sadness filled my chest as I wrapped my hands under the bottom edge of the box.

  I wished I could’ve met her. Even in her final days, Rachel must’ve been an awe-inspiring woman. It was something that had to run in the family, too, if Sylvia was up here herself going through each and every box by hand. She wasn’t even doing it to figure out what was up here to sell it, which only made her more admirable.

  “Do you know much about your aunt’s life before you were born, Sylvia?” I murmured the question, curiosity slowly started to overwhelm the triumph in my veins. Sylvia had told me stories of her aunt before, and I’d found them fascinating. Setting the box on the floor carefully, I turned back around to head back to my original spot.

  “Not really, which is a real shame. I remember Auntie Rachel said she didn’t like talking about growing up and aging because she came from money. She didn’t want her grandkids and all of us to have illusions of grandeur… but you can kind of picture how that turned out. I feel sorry for my cousins, but at the same time, I feel even worse for my Aunt. She died, and all anyone thought about was her money.” The box I shuffled through was rather large, but my gaze only skimmed over the bright red pieces inside. It was a vintage peddle car that had never been assembled. There were a few others up here, one of a fire truck and another of a race car.

  But I couldn’t focus on that when the soft, sad lilt in Sylvia’s voice stole all my attention. From all the things she’d said since she got here, I had an accurate image of her extended family. Rachel had grown up in oil, had married one of the wealthiest men in the country, and Sylvia’s grandmother, Rachel’s sister, had been a business woman. Money revolved around these women, so there were bound to be a few that would take it for granted. But all of them except for Sylvia? That was a travesty.

  “You know, I don’t think the money actually makes a difference. I mean, yeah - it does - but at the same time maybe that’s just how your cousins are. I grew up with no money at all, and my parents weren’t around, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like splurging. Granted, there’s an enormous difference between spending my own money and spending money someone else gifted me, but still…”

  “Why weren’t they around? Were they… you know - druggies?” I could sense how uncomfortable Sylvia was from across the room, but instead of answering immediately I grabbed another box. Thinking about my parents always made me sour, but she’d figure it out anyway. One didn’t move to Alaska at 18 as a guardian for a 13-year-old for no reason, after all.

  “Yeah, I guess you could say that. Only my parents drug of choice was the wilderness. They’d leave for Shoshone National Forest for days at a time when I was young, and then it turned into weeks. I had to grow up fast even before Lucy came along. When I turned 18, I brought us both here, and three years later I opened up my bar.” My tongue felt thick as I basically lied to my possible future mate. Even by omission I still felt grimy. My parents weren’t wilderness nuts and nature experts. They were shifters that lost themselves in their animal and couldn’t shift back to their human form.

  But I shouldn’t feel too bad. It was their fault anyway. They didn’t even send us to human schools, so how human could they have been?

  “I’m sorry, Ryan… I didn’t mean to be insensitive.” Glancing up, I pursed my lips together as Sylvia came into view. She was just standing over a box, her body immobile and face pinched with concern.

  “It’s okay. It was a long time ago, and to be honest, it doesn’t bother me anymore. Lucy, on the other hand- I would never suggest bringing it up. She gets crazy.”

  “We haven’t spoken yet, actually, but something tells me Lucy doesn’t like me very much.” Now that I could believe. I was glad Lucy didn’t like Sylvia.

  I wasn’t sure I could handle them being friends.

  Chapter Ten: Sylvia

  “Listen, Toby, I don’t know what you want me to do. I’m on leave, remember?” Pacing the living room with my cell phone to my ear, my strides were stiff and my lips twisted into a grimace. The receiver crackled, and I clenched and released my free hand a few times before my supervisor’s voice reached me through the line.

  “Sylvia, please- just check a few things for me. This temp is horrible, and I can’t wait for you to get back to fix all of this. Please, for the love of God, do this, and I’ll extend your leave four days.” My body halted at that offer, and I bit down on my bottom lip as my brows came together. Four extra days of paid leave… I didn’t need the money, but the time would be nice.

  Especially considering how complicated things were getting between Ryan and I.

  “... Fine. E-mail it to me. I’ll return it to you before Monday.” I felt so defeated with that admission, going against
my promise not to do any work no matter how much Toby begged. Hanging up before he could say anything, I heaved a sigh as my gaze narrowed on my phone. “Idiot- stupid! I’m such a sucker…”

  “I would hope so, Sylvia.” A squeal burst from my mouth at the deep, teasing voice, and I whirled around with my phone clutched to my chest. My eyes widened on Ryan as he sat lounging on a couch, his legs spread and his body slouching heavily. Once again, he wasn’t wearing a shirt, and for a moment his tattooed chest distracted me.

  But then I remembered he’d said something, and my wandering gaze fixed on his face to harden into a glare.

  “Not that kind of sucker, okay? Didn’t anyone ever teach you to knock?” Crossing my arms over my chest, my cheeks heated at the mental image Ryan had created. Slowly shaking his head, his beard picked up as he smirked, only spreading the heat from my face to other places.

  “Nope. But that’s beside the point. I’m not opening the bar tonight, so I was wondering if you wanted to hang out? We can make dinner tonight, watch some movies. It’ll be fun.” Arching an eyebrow, my eyes narrowed as Ryan’s smirk stretched into a grin. “And if you want to make out and cuddle, I’m not opposed to it.”

  “Right. Why aren’t you opening tonight? I thought you needed every night during the summer.” Even to my own ears, I sounded bland and unimpressed, but my chest constricted all the same. My heart pounded a little harder at the girlish notion that maybe Ryan wasn’t opening because he specifically wanted to spend time with me. It was a naive thing to think, I knew, but it was abdomen clenching regardless.

  In the chair Ryan only shrugged, lifting his muscular arms and sliding his fingers behind neck to cradle his head.

  “Nah, it’s fine. You’re much more pleasant company than a couple dozen drunk people and a sister that never stops complaining. So, what do you say?”